A HUSBAND AND A FATHER

I have been focusing on my role as a husband and a father recently as the Lord has so much to say about these areas in scripture. What has become clear to me over time is that the way we act in these roles impacts our walk and our family. You might not have one of these roles but you will have exposure to them in your life so praying for them can only help us all.

The way a husband treats a wife should reflect the way the Lord treats us. He values this relationship so much and when we get it wrong it opens you up to attack from the enemy.

Malachi 2:13-14 And this is the second thing you do: You cover the altar of the LORD with tears, With weeping and crying; So He does not regard the offering anymore, Nor receive it with goodwill from your hands. 14 Yet you say, “For what reason?” Because the LORD has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, With whom you have dealt treacherously; Yet she is your companion And your wife by covenant. 15 But did He not make them one, Having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Therefore take heed to your spirit, And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.

OK that is pretty blunt, but it is clear. Any time we give offense to anyone we are setting ourselves up for a fall in our walk and our prayer life. But this is amplified when it comes to our relationship with our wife.

When you look at the story of Jacob, Leah and Rachel we get a glimpse of how the Lord looks at this relationship.  Jacob wasn’t treating Leah the same as Rachel, so the Lord saw this and made sure Leah was blessed.  He wants the wife to feel loved and looked after in the relationship and He watches this intently. As a husband if we don’t do this well He will step in and correct and this will be an issue for me as a husband.

I have mentioned previously where the Lord has highlighted to me that where a man has a pattern of not holding onto money or building wealth then look at what he is doing in the marriage. Is the husband looking at other women, or porn or having an affair. This will lead to a direct impact on financial well being.

1 Peter 3:7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honour to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.

Do I treat my wife right? Do I give honour to her?

These are questions I need to ask myself as this will impact me, my family, my legacy.

Ephesians 5 25-29 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her,

26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word,

27 that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.

28 So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself.

29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church.

So, my question to myself as a husband is am I doing all that I can in this area to reflect how the Lord wants me to reflect Him.

The second important role the Father has been highlighting to me is that of being a father and the impact this has.

Fathers set the scene. We see this in Abraham.

Genesis 26:4-5 “And I will make your descendants multiply as the stars of heaven; I will give to your descendants all these lands; and in your seed all the nations of the earth shall be blessed; 5 “because Abraham obeyed My voice and kept My charge, My commandments, My statutes, and My laws.”

Genesis 26:24 And the LORD appeared to him the same night and said, “I am the God of your father Abraham; do not fear, for I am with you. I will bless you and multiply your descendants for My servant Abraham’s sake.”

As a father if I could have these verses tattooed on the inside of my eyelids so I see them all the time that would be great. As a father the way I walk with the Lord, what I do, how I complete the calling I have will flow down to the Lord’s blessings on my children, grandchildren and future generations.

If my father or grandfather walked as Abraham did imagine the blessings that would flow down to me as a result of this. God loves us and where our ancestors haven’t walked with the Lord the way they should doesn’t mean we aren’t blessed as our heavenly Father knows this. But there is a higher level of blessings that can be achieved for our ancestors where we walk obeying His voice, His commandments, His statutes and His laws.

My role as a husband and as a father play together and have a direct impact on my legacy to my family. I could leave a billion dollars planned out in trust funds etc for future generations, but I can leave an even better trust fund which is eternal through the way I Walk. Let me be an Abraham to my family.

Another great example of this father legacy is David. The Lord acknowledged David as a man of God.

David didn’t do everything perfectly (like us!), but he did walk with the Lord and the Lord blessed him and his legacy in this.

David got it wrong with Uriah and this impacted directly his family.

David was a violent man of war and this impacted generations of his family.

David got it right with his relationship with the Lord and his family legacy got the blessings from this.

1 Kings 9 4 “As for you, if you walk before me faithfully with integrity of heart and uprightness, as David your father did, and do all I command and observe my decrees and laws, 5 I will establish your royal throne over Israel forever, as I promised David your father when I said, ‘You shall never fail to have a successor on the throne of Israel.’

David’s descendants got the benefit of the doubt you could argue because of the flow down effect from David and his walk with the Father.

That has to be the best gift I can leave my descendants. If every time I am making a questionable decision, or my walk wavers imagine if I can bring these scriptures to mind and understand that the decision I make will have a direct impact on my legacy. This has to change the way we walk.

Jeremiah 14:20 We acknowledge, O LORD, our wickedness and the iniquity of our fathers, For we have sinned against You.

Check out the teaching I have on generational impact if you feel you have some questionable behaviours in your direct ancestors. Let’s be free from any wrong legacy.

My walk as a husband and as a father is just so important. I have areas to make up for, I have areas I need to improve, and I have areas I have got right. My prayer is for revelation where I am getting these areas wrong so that I can leave the best legacy possible.